If I could sum up this past year of my life, I would say it's been awakening. Last January, our little family of 5 picked up and moved away from everything and everyone we know and love, in order for Jason to take a job in good 'ole St. Joseph.
Me, personally, I've lived in OKC since I was a baby. I've never known anything other than Oklahoma. The layout of the land, the people, the culture... so this adventure was slightly intimidating to me. Honestly, we're a year in, and I'm still intimidated.
First, the good that's come of this. It has been such a blessing on our family to have Jason home every night. We went 4 1/2 years of him traveling, only being home on occasional weekends. So it is amazing to have him home every night, for the girls to be able to see him every day. I wouldn't trade that for the world! Moving away from family has it's ups & downs. It's been nice to rely on one another for everything we need. We don't have places to go constantly on the weekends. We do what we want, and we enjoy our time together as OUR family. Because ultimately, that is what's important to us. It's really taught us how important we are to each other. The girls are in a great school here and we are enjoying our church (which is where the girls go to school).
Now on to the not-so-fun parts... I absolutely HATE missing out on things. I HATE not being there for friends and family when they need me. It seems like this past year, there have been so many times that I felt like I needed to be back 'home' for one person or another, more so than any other year. Maybe it's just because I'm further away and unable to be there that I notice so much, but it just seemed like a lot of events have taken place that I wasn't able to be there for. Just to name a few.... about 2 weeks after we moved up here, my best friend, Nicole's dad passed away from cancer. I wasn't able to drive back home for the funeral... I wasn't able to physically be there for her, and that killed me! I sent flowers as my condolences... but that just felt so impersonal. Then, my cousin, Tamara, and her family lost their house in a tornado... again, not able to be there. Not that I could have really done anything to help, but I just hated FEELING helpless from such a distance. So i did what I could from afar and had a wonderful friend who stepped up and helped out for me :) (Thanks Danielle!) Another instance... I get a call one day telling me that my dad was taken to the hospital due to a wasp sting. Usually not a big deal, it's just a wasp, right? Well, not when you're highly allergic. So naturally, panic ensued! I started calling and texting my dad, or anyone who might know where he is.... and I can't get ahold of him. Feeling completely helpless (once again), I finally called my brother and asked him to go check on him for me. I received a phone call from my dad shortly thereafter. He had been stung on the top of the ear, and had an allergic reaction. He managed to drive to my aunt and uncles house (thank God!) and had my uncle take him in. He's been allergic for all these years (and known it) and yet he didn't have an epi-pen! My way of reaching out on this one was to bug him enough to make sure he went and picked up his newly prescribed epi-pen. Day after day I texted and called and bugged... until finally he sends me a picture of his "epi-pen". It was a yellow highlighter with "epi-pen" written in black on the front of it. Funny, Dad! But then he did actually go pick the real epi-pen up. And finally, just a couple of weeks ago my mom had a knee replacement. Kind of a big deal. I did drive down for the actual surgery itself, and I stayed while she was in the hospital. But I haven't been there for the recovery/healing process. I'm not there to take care of her, and that kills me. She's been there for me through all my c-section recoveries, every time I was ever sick, any time I ever needed anything, she was right there. So how could I be okay with not being there to help her through her recovery? It sucks! But I know that she is in good hands at my grandma's house, and I know she's doing well... at least that's what i'm told! ;o)
These are just some of the major things that I've missed out on.... there have been many other things. All the birthday parties we've missed, family gatherings, and most importantly, my grandparents from California came down in September... and I missed out on that. :( I haven't seen them in many years... probably about 8-9... and I missed it. I was so bummed. I hope I can catch their next visit!
So while this move has had it's good and it's bad, it's been awakening. It's helped me realize what is important in life, and how much I love and miss all my family and friends back home. It's been a learning experience all the way around. I've developed new friendships along the way, and maybe have had one or two that have struggled a bit. But as I find my way and what is important to me, good things will follow. Those left behind didn't need to be there in the first place.
